Who Will Come To My Aid If Something Bad Happens To Me?

I regard the title of this note as the name of a serious psychological disease. A vast number of persons who have come in my contact suffer from this syndrome. Aged and young alike are the victims of this syndrome, though the seniors suffer more. The answer to this question is that God will come to my aid and for the non-believers, my past actions ('karmas') will come to my aid if something bad happens to me. "Bad" also needs to be defined and clearly understood. Nothing that happens as a result of the working of Nature is bad.

Indian culture and tradition has inculcated in us the concept that father and mother are gods (Pitra devo bhava, Mtra devo bhava) and we have to be loyal, respectful to them. Serving the parents and the grand parents in every possible manner brings us divine blessing. I find it difficult to accept this concept in toto. We should be thankful to our parents and elders for all the sacrifices they have made for us. It should give us pleasure and satisfaction to serve and help the seniors. If the father is corrupt and debauch, we need not be loyal to him. Our loyalty should be for certain ideals and values and not for individuals.

I am loyal to my boss because he holds the key to my promotion. I am loyal to my party President for he will nominate me to Rajya Sabha. Personally speaking, I am now from this burden of loyalities. At 73, I have no professional promotion to seek and I do not nurture any political ambitions. This is one of the many reasons why I feel so light and unburdened these past many years. Still there is one aspect of this 'pitra devo bhava' concept that causes lots of problems for old persons of my age group. They expect too much from their sons and daughters, and, being disillusioned, indulge in self-pity and frustration. My message to fellow greys is that the children are now Papas and Moms and their first priority is to take care of their families. Let us accept the one and the only truth - God will come to our (and everyone else's) aid if something bad happens to us. Chances are that nothing 'bad' will happen to anyone of us.

In one of my earlier posts, I had remarked that old persons do not have a future. This remark came under severe criticism by some of my very near and dear ones, as they thought that the remark smacked of pessimism, frustration and negative attitude. Now I want to clarify that having no future is to be interpreted as 'freedom from future.' Who does not want freedom? Who would like to remain a slave?

Right from the childhood we have remained slaves of future. Planning for our exams, planning for a career, planning for marriage, children's education, their marriage, etc. etc. Now we are senior ctizens - retired from job and free from domestic obligations. Our main responsibility now is to look after ourselves and help others if such a help is sought. The past is dead, the future cannot be predicted. The present is the only reality. Let us live in the eternal NOW, which is the only reality. I appeal to all the senior citizens not to brood over the past and not to worry about future. We have lived the past, we are not aware of future. We have achieved freedom. Let us live every moment of the present and be happy.

My Current Interests.

These days I am always thinking of diseases, death and divinity. I am neither depressed nor negative. It is just that these topics fascinate me a lot.

Nuclear Families, The Children & The Aged Persons

Social, Economic and Political changes have been far-reaching and fast in our country during these last six decades. The middle class has more amenities now. Life has become more comfortable. Due to economic factors and also due to enhanced professional mobility Joint family has become extinct, at least in the urban middle class. Society has embraced enthusiastically the concept of privacy, personal freedom and non-interference. These are really very good social ideals and personally I believe that they are good for us. The young as well as the elderly are wary of guarding their personal freedom. The above mentioned factors leave no scope for joint family to survive.

The death of the joint family has two major fall outs - the neglect of the infants and of the elderly or old persons. Creches or day nurseries are rendering very useful services where both the parents are professionally engaged. These creches are doing good business and earning quite well.

What about the oldies? Old age homes are mostly run by NGOs on charity. It is mostly the poor persons who live in these homes and are dependent on the charity of individuals and institutions. I have a suggestion to make. Will some enterprising persons run old age homes as a source of earning? There is, I think, lot of money in the business of running old age homes. In the cities there are a good number of elders who are capable of paying for the services rendered to them, though they are physically unable to live by themselves. The population of the elders has considerably increased in our country, thanks to the advanced medical care now available and also a sort of revolution in our society for awareness about health and fitness.

My suggestion is that more and better creches as well as old homes run on commercial lines is the need of the hour.

God's Gift.

It is quite common to blame one's 'fate' for one's miseries. 'Fate has been unkind to me' or 'God hasn't been very generous to me' - these are the complaints of the unhappy or unlucky persons. I feel that these complaints against fate, God or Nature are not justified. God gives in abundance. His treasury is overflowing with gifts to each and everyone. He does not discriminate. We get what we are capable of getting. One is more lucky than the other because he has greater capacity to be happy. One has more resources than the other because he is more industrious. It all depends on us; the more we are capable to hold , the more we possess. God is ever ready to give whatever we want; we have only to receive and retain that which is readily available to all of us. "Bahut diya dene wale ne tujhko, aanchal hi na samaye to kya keeje."